Just another manic Monday...

I can't get over how wealthy the people I work with are. They're great people, really nice and everybody's been really friendly so far so it's not like anyone's a snob or anything, but it catches me off guard when I realize the different economic classes of my coworkers. Granted, most of them have been in the business for a long time and have had a chance to establish their finances. Today when I came in two of my coworkers were talking about graduations. One of the guys had a son and daughter graduating and we were just talking for a second about that and then the other lady said "So they're both getting the Boxster for graduation?" And he goes "Oh yeah, they both are" then the lady said "Yeah, Gretchen asked for one too" and I wondered to myself, "Hm..what's a boxster?" I figured it was either a lunch combo meal from a deli or some sort of mp3 player or other various piece of electronic equipment that I was not aware of, so I decided to look it up on google. So I sit down on my fancy schmancy chair at my fancy schmancy desk and type in "boxster" at my fancy schmancy computer. Then the screen came up and I was awestruck at what was before me. A ''boxster" is not a small electronic device. No no friends, a "boxster" is a freakin Porsche. A p-o-r-s-c-h-e that's right, A car. but not just any car, a porsche that costs somewhere in the neighborhood of 45 to 55 THOUSAND dollars. I about had a heart attack at my fancy schmancy desk. I could not believe it. I then told my coworkers that they could give me a graduation gift if they wanted to.

But honestly! It blows my lower middle class mind. My family has never owned a car that costs over 20,000 dollars, and even then we drive them for 14 years or until they blow up, whichever comes first. Not that we've ever been in dire need or wanted for anything, but I just can't fathom that kind of money. What would you do with all of it? That is one thing that I've never really been comfortable with in my chosen career path. Yes, there is the opportunity to make exorbitant amounts of money while spending other people's insane amounts of money, but I've never really been ok with that much money. Which makes me wonder. although I do aspire to do my best, It's never really been a goal or desire of mine to climb the financial ladder. So, if my best ends up making me a six figure salary, then what? I could definitely take care of my family, but I don't want to lose touch with reality and I definitely don't want to live like I'm making a six figure salary. Is that crazy? I don't know, Money changes everything, even though you don't want it to. I guess what I'm saying is that even if I make enough money to end up buying two freaking porsches in the same year for the kids that I probably won't have, I hope I don't buy them.

Saturday Night Fever

It's Saturday night here in good old Denver. It's been pretty hot here lately, about 90 today, but it's cooled off a bit since this afternoon. I finished off my first week of my internship strong. I learned alot, got to know the people a bit better there and can't wait to finish out the summer. It's such a great place to work, I feel like I already have been there awhile because the people are so friendly and are more importantly really willing to teach me things while I'm there.

I get so eager to do everything, and when I get frustrated because I don't already know how to do something, or if it feels like I'm not working on something every second, I have to take a breath and remind myself that I've only worked there five days. I just really want to succeed at this job and exceed my expectations and especially the expectations of my employers. It's really nice being on my own with this too. As miserable as Ms. Martin can sometimes make my life, she's only a miniscule part of it, and even though she holds authority at Anderson, she most certainly does not hold any authority in my internship. It's good to be able to step outside that Anderson microscope and spread my wings a little bit and see how I can do on my own in the "real world" That sounds pretty egotistical, but it's kind of true. This is a brand new challenge in my life, and as with any challenge, it's sink or swim. I was a little bit nervous coming into it, just because I didn't know how I would perform outside of my comfort zone. But so far, I feel like I've embraced the challenge. It's kind of funny, whenever I have something new like this in my life where I am uncertain, I tell myself it's ok to be nervous, but you still have to work through it. Half the time, the uncertainty helps me to do better. It's like I have to overcompensate just to make sure all my bases are covered. But again, it's been great so far, and I'm really excited and anxious to see how far I can get with this job.

Well that's the news on the business front, which also happens to be the major front in my life, because it's certainly not the relationship front. I don't mind being single. When else am I going to get a chance to be completely self-centered? Just kidding. But really, I know that this is apparently what God wants for me right now. However, I bring this whole topic up because it's also apparent to me that every year in the spring/summertime, I always get the relationship question from people. 3 times in the past two days.
-The first time was a straightforward "Are you dating anybody yet?" Nope, not yet, I'll keep you posted (roll my eyes).

-The second time, Joan, a funny designer at work, asked me in a little bit different way: "So Gillian, are ya hot with anybody right now??" "hee hee, No Joan, pretty cold actually"

- The third time was a bit random as well, I had just met a somewhat elderly couple at my grandparents house. My grandma had just told them that I was going to Peru for a missions trip. Little Old lady: "Oh that's so Wonderful!" Little old man: "Are you going to bring home a boyfriend?" Me: "Um, well, hopefully I'll be focusing more on the mission work than boys..."

So I don't mind the questions so much, especially when they're funny like that, but I do wonder why it ends up being a big deal, well maybe not a big deal, but any sort of deal at all. Who knows? Anyway, it's all God's timing, so that's definitely one less thing that I have to worry about. Well, it's close to 11 and I need to go to bed and then enjoy the Sabbath tomorrow. One week until Peru! Please continue to pray for the trip as well as for the rest of my support money to come in! Good Night!

She Works Hard for the Money!

Well it is now 5:03 pm and I have successfully completed my first day as a working professional interior design...intern. However, I really feel like a professional now. Here's what has led me to this business like change:

- I have my own desk. My very own desk. And it's big too! I can put stuff on it like pictures and plants (of which there are already two that were left on my desk) and have my very own pens and rubber bands and binder clips which I hold in my very own drawers.

- I will have my very own computer. Good thing I have my very own desk to put it on

- I have my very own professional citron workspaces e-mail account. Good thing I can check my e-mail on my very own computer.

- I can put my lunch in the company refrigerator, and then get it out at the appropriate lunch time and eat it...at my desk, or outside if I so choose.

Well those are the things that have made me happy today. This is going to be pretty much an amazing internship. I love the company, I love the people here, I love my desk and I think the only thing that is keeping me down on the student level is the thought that I have one more year of school left and the fact that I don't have my very own business cards....soon though, very soon. Well, my first day is done, the company already took me out to lunch, tomorrow I'm going to the staff meeting because I'm part of the staff. Then at 11:30 I will be going on a business luncheon at the Chophouse. And I'm not paying!!! For those of you who don't know, the ChopHouse is a super ritzy restaurant that poor people like me should not think about going inside, but now I can, because I have my very own fake professional pass. Wheee! Soo, that's about it for now, I'm going to go home after a long day at the office..oh man, I tell you what, if that copier gives me any more trouble....whew. Just kidding. I really do like my job though. I'll keep you guys posted!

On the Road Again...and again, and again....

Good Lord, does the road ever end? Hm, about 17 hours down the road hopefully. Oy! I hate this drive, but hey, it's my annual on the road blogpost! Woohoo! I'm actually posting right now from the same Holiday Inn Express in Paducah Kentucky that I posted at some other time that I was on my way home. However, as my good friend Philip reminded me, I am on the road for a purpose and will be seeing the mountains within the next 36 hours or so, barring any unforeseen disasters, or foreseen disasters for that matter. So far, I almost was run off the road by a semi....twice, I've seen lots of roadkill (gross) but the prize for the most disgusting is actually a toss-up between the dead goat (random) and the decapitated (literally) deer. Probably my least favorite part of roadtrips is the actually roadtrip. Oh well. What can you do? I don't have any funny stories to post yet, but I've only made it to Kentucky. As much as I hate Kansas and Missouri, there usually a few good stories from there. We'll see.

Well, there's not really anything worth posting tonight. In the 7 or 8 hours that I've driven so far, I've had alot of time to think. that and listen to Adventures in Odyssey thanks to friend Philip once more who loaned me the 4 disc set. I'm not sure if anyone's ever found a hole in the Spacetime continuum, but I feel like this cd set has been my ticket back into my childhood, and my own personal spacetime portal. Sooooooo many memories. Sigh, good times. Well anyway, I think I'm gonna hit the Holiday Inn Express hay and not think about how much driving tomorrow through Kansas is gonna suck. For the sake of my sanity, if you read this, call my cellphone and keep me awake tomorrow and Tuesday.

I'm sitting here in my somewhat empty suite in the Village dorm surveying what lies ahead of me. I'm finished with my Junior year (though I technically have been a Senior since December) and finished off with only one B. Guess who's class! Martin....
Oh well, we all knew it would happen. Anyway, so that makes my GPA this semester a 3.8 and my cumulative a 3.57 I've been trying for the last three years to counter Ms. Martin's Bs, but alas, she has pretty much stomped on my gpa and is holding it down as best she can with her pointy toed shoes.

So since I'm done with my schooling, this week has been just me trying to pack up my room slowly, because I despise moving. But it also has been filled with fun stuff too. Birthday parties, Corbett McGees, and tomorrow night, my friend Jeff Prater on guitar, me on the cello, and Chris Bradley on the Acordion will be gracing the Coffee Underground Open Mic Night stage with some of Jeff's original works, as well as a medley of old timey hymns. I am so excited! It'll be fun, if you can make it, then make it, because who doesn't want to hear an acordion? I just don't know.

I got out of my funk probably a day after I posted that last comment. I don't mean to leave up the not so happy posts so long, and I'm not depressed or anything, but I just forget to change them and then it makes me look sad all the time. Oh well, Hopefully this post has been happy enough to leave up for awhile.

I'm going back home on Sunday. All alone....all 25 hours....alllllll by myseeelf, don't wanna be, allll by myseeeeeelf anymore. Sigh. I hate that drive. Oh well, at least it gets me home. Much love people.

Pure Funk, Disc 1

So outside the window at work where I am sitting, dutifully making calls to inquiring minds, I am watching a woodpecker. Woodpeckers are pretty neat birds I think, although if I were a bird I would be a cardinal. I would be a really vain cardinal though, because the whole time I would probably just fly near glass so that I could admire how good I look. I wasn't really going anywhere with that, but I just had that thought.

Anyway, so I am most certainly ready for this school year to be over so that I can just get out of here. It's that time of year when I just get stretched too thin. I wrote about the same stuff last year. It's not that I don't/can't say no, but it's the fact that people just start demanding and expecting and then I don't get a chance to say no. But oh well, what is life if not frustrating once in a while.

And frustrating it is right now. I'm in a funk. And not the "Workin at the Car Wash" fun kind of funk. The bad kind. I am now on a 3 day streak of bad day-ness. Nothing majorly bad has happened to have made me had a 3 day long bad day, but it's that type of day when all the little things go wrong and just start piling up. Of course, maybe it's just my attitude about it. Maybe, everyday just as many little things go wrong, but for whatever reason, I have been especially sensitive to the little things the last 3 days. Well whatever the reason, I'll be glad when it's over. Sigh. I would type more, but I'm in funk. I'm just kidding, but only partially.


Well, I can't think right now of anything that I really want to get into too much. But I will say this. I am now officially addicted to the T.V. show "Lost" It's completely Diana's and Hope's fault but now I'm addicted. So if anyone wants to buy the first and/or second season DVD for me, I most definitely would not be opposed to that.

Here comes the SUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Alright now. The last two weeks have been CRAZY. Crazy busy, crazy dramatic, crazy everything that makes me tired and want to do nothing but veg out while watching the National Geographic Channel. It's a good thing that this Friday I have the whole day off for Good Friday.. Oy, there's just been so many extra things the past two weeks. Concerts, String Ensemble concerts, playing for recitals, going to this that and the other thing, and, oh yeah, that little thing called College. Phew. I'm beat! But hey, it's April, and we all know that April is the latin work for "Active."

Alright, so I'm full of baloney, or bologna for you stout traditionalists, either way, all I know is that April to me has always meant lots of running around and not a lot of down time. But hey summer will be starting soon and I am thankful for it. This summer will be fairly exciting for me as I may now be considered a professional intern (is that an oxymoron?) I say professional because I will be receiving the fantastic salary of minimum wage, which when you consider that I have to work 200 hours for my internship, I potentiall will make 1000 dollars. 950 of which will probably end up going to the whichever Gas station I end up frequenting. But hey, it's a job. I am going to be working at Citron Workspaces under the direction of Kathey Pear and Kim Tyrrell. What's that? Why yes you can look up their website at www.citronworkspaces.com What's that? Why yes I am excited for this new chapter in my life. What's that? I don't know why I'm acting like I'm face to face talking to you with a serious hearing problem.

Anyway, So that's pretty much been the biggest news of my life so far, oh yeah and I'll be living in a real house next year that the school owns. Wheeee!!! I'm really excited, because I'm going to be able to have a basement studio to practice in and a yard that I can plant flowers in, and some awesome housemates, and some super awesome neighbors, and somewhere around 2000 sq feet to practice my residential design in. Yay! I'll post pictures as soon as I can get them.

Well that's about it I think. I think I began this blogpost with every intention of writing something meaningful or profound or just generally worth your time, but I'm pretty tired right now, and I can't remember why I thought I had something worthwhile to say. Oh well, Maybe next time...

It's like a one-woman show of hectic-ness!

Well, it's about time to update this thing seeing as how now it's April and I'm no longer so very close to death. Last week was a rough week, but I'm better now and currently about to face a very very busy next seven days head on- busy, but at the same time, exciting. Oh Life, you never quit, do you?

So here it is Thursday night, and I will run through my schedule now, not necessarily for anyone's reading enjoyment, but mostly for my sake of figuring out exactly what I need to do.

Tomorrow is almost here!!! Why is that so exciting you may ask? What's so special about April 7th? Well, tomorrow night marks the culmination of something that I have been working towards for the last year of my life. Tomorrow Night at 8 pm in the Henderson Auditorium, I, accompanied graciously by the Anderson Symphony Orchestra, will make my debut as a Young Artist and one of four winners of the Concerto/Aria contest. I will be playing Haydn's Cello concerto in C major. Now, I feel I must take some time to share my feelings about this. First of all, I'm thrilled. It's amazing to say the least to see your work come through. Second, I'm a little worried because I feel like I'm bragging...and I hate that. I'm my toughest critic and I would rather anything else than to act like a snotty musician because I know exactly what my capabilities are and exactly how not close enough they are for me to act like that. I find it hard for me to tell people about the concert without feeling pompous, but at the same time, I want my friends to share this with me, because I feel like this is a milestone in my life. I am accomplishing exactly what I have set out to do. I have been practicing alot and working hard and it's satisfying. It's kind of a tension between feeling satisfied with my work and taking credit. I know what my level of playing is I don't want to give people an impression that I'm any better than I am. that's just the little wrestling match going on inside me right now. Anyway so that's what's going on tomorrow night. (don't let me fool you, I really am happy)

SATURDAY!!!!!!! the day of rest and recouperation. HA no. I have to work open house, ALLLL day and then go see my old friend Collin Derrick's concert saturday night. Psh... who needs time to do homework?

SSSSSSSUUUUUUUUUUUUUNDAY. The Lord's Day. I will first be observing the Sabbath by going to church and then after I get fed, I will be using that newly acquired energy to make it through the rest of my week. Sunday Afternoon, Anderson University has decided that the change from College to University is call for a giganto celebration complete with ice cream and stuff and hub-bub and a free concert by the Anderson Symphony Orchestra...oh wait, that's me too, huh? Yep. So there goes Sunday afternoon. Then I get to go to a Peru meeting Sunday night. I am excited for that, but at the same time, I am starting to really wonder when I will have time to finish all my work. Hm, good question.

Monday....the day of mon. Actually I don't even think I'm going to go through the rest of the days, but it will be a blur of tests, quizzes, musical performances, concerts, papers, projects being due, and maybe some sleep thrown in here and there. Other duties as assigned.

well I think that's about it. The next seven days start out exciting and then will probably end with some stress. Oh well...Lord give me strength to accomplish what you will have me to do! Bye Everyone!!!!

102 degrees...

uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuugggggggggggghhhhhhhhhh

uuuuu......uuuuuuuuuuuuuuggggggggggh.....
uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhh

I think I have the flu, or people are also telling me that I possibly have a sinus infection. Either way, my head is about to implode and everytime I cough my head feels like a bass drum during a high school marching band competition. Everything I do now takes twice as long to do. Things like walking, typing this blog, talking, thinking, laughing, and just generally everything else. I can't remember the last time I felt this bad. I feel like I'm too tired to even try and fight it, which normally I just pretend like I'm not sick and keep going until the sick decides to leave. This one has me beat. Beat like....something that is typically beaten..badly. So that's my life right now. Congested, coughing, feverish, achy, and just all around bad.
uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhh

Ms. Baikie, Ms. Gillian Baikie, please see the attendant to claim your free granola bar

Well, somehow or another, I've managed to once again pick the returning spring break flight that ends up being super delayed. It's becoming something of a spring break tradition for me I think (See last year's post about this same time). Well This time it is a little different though I have to admit. I'm stuck in Denver, which frankly, is much more appealing to me than being stuck in the Cleveland, Ohio airport. I do like airports. I love watching the people and talking with different people, like the security guard who told me that I had a nice smile and that it was almost as big as his, which was a bright start to my morning.

Contintental Airlines had some equipment malfunction so the inbound flight which was to later turn into my outbound flight never quite made it. So rather than leaving from Denver at 9:40, I now get to leave at 11:50. Wheee!!! Again, it's not that bad because I was going to have a 2 and half hour layover anyway in Cleveland, so basically I'm just spending that layover time here in Denver. Plus, since it was technically the airline's fault that we're stuck here, they brought out a special "We're Sorry!" Snack cart, because apparently there is no layover long enough that can't be made up with Doritos, Chewy Granola Bars, Milano Cookies and Dr. Pepper. I defintiely swiped multiples. Hey, I'm just trying to let them make their amends...with snacks. And they gave me a coupon to get either Free movie headsets, a coupon at the duty free shop, or a free alcoholic beverage on the flight. Too bad my 21st birthday is still 5 weeks away. Not really, Who doesn't want duty free items!?!

Well that's my airport spring break update. hopefully this trip will not end up being a repeat of last year's disaster. Yikes!

Someone hire me.

well here I sit, once more in my favorite coffee shop in Denver staring out the window at the hustle and bustle of Regis University which happens to be right across the street. Clearly Regis students are not on spring break.

My trip home has been great. Very relaxing. When I got home friday, my family and my aunt and cousin went out to get some good Mexican food and then my parents and I went to the Boulder Theater (obviously in Boulder) to go see Chick Corea. He's a jazz musician that's had something like a forty year career and he is absolutely amazing. He's been doing alot lately with latin/flamenco music, and this concert was nothing but that. They even had a professional flamenco dancer come out for some of the songs. It was pretty much beyond words. I'll just leave it at the fact that it was the best concert that I had ever been to (jazz or otherwise).

Then on Saturday, we went over to see my grandparents which is always a treat and then went shopping for an outfit for me to perform in. Perform open heart surgery I mean. Just kidding, we actually ended up just getting an outfit for me to wear for the Concerto Concert which by the way is coming up quickly. yowzas! I'm excited! Then after that we ended up going to see the Ballet. They performed Prokofiev's Cinderella and it was gorgeous. The denver center just built a new opera house which is also where the ballet performs and it's amazing in there. All of the seat backs have these little computer screens that give the synopsis of what is going on during the ballet and should you be seeing an opera, it would give the translation. Neato!

Oh my goodness also when we were out shopping, I ran into an old friend from high school that I hadn't seen for a really long time. And she apparently is getting married at the end of next month. It was kind of weird, I have a hard time getting super girly excited about things like that. For whatever reason, the first thought that pops into my head is "why?" Which makes me sound like I have no heart at all. Maybe I just feel like I'm so young and don't have any prospect for that sort of thing that it's hard for me to understand. I never really pictured marriage being a huge deal in my life. Honestly it's easier for me to picture myself as a 30 something that's still single than it is for me to picture myself married. I know that's pretty weird, but eh, someone's gotta be the crazy old single lady down the street that the neighborhood kids talk about right?

Well anyway, so that was pretty much my weekend. Today I made up my resume and have been doing some internship hunting. I have an interview tomorrow so pray for that. I'm excited to see where God takes me with this internship. On another note, I wrote out my support letters for Peru, which I will address and stamp tonight and we'll see from there. Oh yeah, I also randomly printed out an application for mission work with the Lutheran church. Basically, I'm going to send it in and if something comes up, then it will come up. I put on there that I am interested in Latin America and available in June of 2007. There are some churches in Venezuela. I've always wanted to go visit there. Who knows what will happen.

I surely don't know. I'm just interested to see how things turn out.

Thank you Mario, but our princess is in another castle!

what is it about getting away? the simple act of just removing yourself from a location obviously won't solve a problem, unless the problem lies within the location. For instance, should you happen to be standing knee deep in a tank full of leeches, then removing yourself from that location will probably help alot. But other than that, really. We try so hard to deal with the struggles of everyday life, to deal with work, school, family, friends, and everything else in between and then eventually, as if we didn't know it before, we find that we can't. We just go until we get to that place where you just "have to get away."
I think I've reached it. I'm ready for Spring Break, I'm ready to go home and not worry about my Anderson life. Sometimes I feel like I kind of live in two different worlds. When I'm home, I'm home and my Colorado life is my Colorado life and every pressure or struggle or whatever from my South Carolina life can't touch me. I of course realize that I have to keep up with the South Carolina world because those pressures will still be there when I get back, but it's like I'm Mario, when he gets the star for a little bit. You can just fly through the level. Who cares about the goombas or the Koopa Troopas, they can't touch you when you're invincibile.
So that's basically what my plane ticket home is. My temporary invincibility. As whatever as it is to move 1500 miles away to go to college, sometimes it's really nice to know that my South Carolina world is far enough away that I can escape it when I need to, but also to know that it and the people in that world will still be there for me when I need it and them to be.

so that's my first thought of the day, just the whole "I'm ready to go" thought, and I suppose my next thought somewhat stems from that. So...I'm getting older and I, naturally, have grown as a person. I was reflecting today now that I am a senior junior (I technically have the credit hours for a senior, but I will graduate still in a year) and it's really interesting to me to see how my outlook on alot of things has changed. I've always kind of been the uptight one when it comes to schoolwork and my future and though I believe that that side of me has served me well. I'm not sure I would have tried so hard in different things if I wasn't that uptight about grades. Well, I feel like I've loosened up alot as far as my future plans go. Before, I would absolutely freak out about not knowing where I was going to end up in life, or if I didn't know every last iota of information about what was going to happen. But now, I don't know...it's just different. I'm not concerned so much about knowing exactly where I will be and what I will be doing in 2 years and all that stuff. I have absolutely no idea what is going to happen. I might end up doing interior design, I might find something else to do and never look back. mission work has been on my heart alot. Maybe not as a lifetime thing, but definitely for a few months or years or decades...who knows. Sometimes I try to think about what I would do differently if I could start all over with the college search and major/minor decision and everything, but everytime I come up with the same conclusion- I don't think I would change anything. Maybe I won't end up in Interior design, but that doesn't make my experiences these past 3 years pointless. I guess I just don't see the benefit in starting over, when I can just build on to what I already have. I think I picture it kind of like a house. My house so far has been great, exactly what I've needed, but maybe (in the not too distant future) I'm going to need something different or bigger or...whatever, so why should I move to a new house that won't contain the same features of my old house that I might still end up using later? Just add on! Besides...that saves the trouble of getting a realtor anyway. So that's my second thought of the day. Basically, I'm ok with not knowing, and I actually somewhat enjoy the not knowing (much to my former self's surprise). Who knows?

Thank you for calling Anderson University....

So I'm at work right now (the great debate about whether or not I am really a vital part to the admissions team still continues. I do have a nametag however- though it is the color of mocos- that makes me look like I belong) ((Just kidding, I'm giving a tour today so I'm just waiting for that, I hope they don't fire me for my ill-placed jokes)).

Anyway, So today I've done some things. First, I woke up, then I went to class and got an 87 on my test (yay!), then I skipped class, then practiced, and then I about had a heart attack when there was a mysterious grease spot on my bow hair that made it virtually impossible to play, then I calmed down a little bit when I realized my other bow would work just fine, then I waited.....then I got nervous.....then I calmed down, then I sat down and played my piece. Then I left the room. Then I got lunch and was all jittery. Then I went back to rainey. Then I saw my name on a piece of paper. Then I saw the word "congratulations" next to my name. Then I got really happy. then I called my mom. Then I went to class and learned more about Dizzy Gillespie. Salt Peanuts. Saltpeanuts.

That's pretty much been my day so far. I think it's been a pretty good one.

Today it was pretty outside.

Definitely not working right now....

Well.... I'm not exactly sure what to write right now. Things are changing in my life, and though it's hard to swallow, It most definitely is for the best. *Sigh* Darn you things that are good for me.

Anyway, I'm not depressed right now or anything. I'm most definitely taking comfort and rest in the promises of God. Sometimes friends can be really good comforting friends without even knowing it. An unnamed friend put up a scripture reference as an away message, and it's just a good passage all around. It's Psalm 73:21-28

21When my soul was embittered, when I was pricked in heart, 22I was brutish and ignorant; I was like a beast toward you.

23Nevertheless, I am continually with you; you hold my right hand. 24You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will receive me to glory. 25Whom have I in heaven but you? And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides you. 26My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength[b] of my heart and my portion forever.

27For behold, those who are far from you shall perish; you put an end to everyone who is unfaithful to you. 28But for me it is good to be near God; I have made the Lord GOD my refuge, that I may tell of all your works.

Jesus, I am resting, resting
In the joy of what Thou art;
I am finding out the greatness
Of Thy loving heart.

No point today.

I miss writing regularly on this thing. The question now is, will my missing it spark enough motiviation in me to do something about it or if this will become something that I miss, but it was nice while it lasted. Probably a mixture of the two is my guess. I was thinking about it the other night after the Lighting of the Greens at Josh Hardy's house when I stopped at Jittery Joe's for a nice Chai. It was good, It had been awhile since I had taken myself out and I almost forgot how much I enjoyed it. The only problem I had with the evening was that there were people sitting at this one table and I was severely blocked from reading my favorite book at Jittery Joe's. It's an old harback copy of the complete works of Rudyard Kipling who is very quickly becoming one of my favorite authors. I love the way he writes and it makes me wish that he were my story-telling grandpa (in addition to my grandpa already whom I love very much). Anyway, I was unfortunate to have to read a biographical essay about Goethe by Emerson, which I suppose there are worse fates, but It was a little bit heavy for me when I was already kind of tired. Anyway, so while I was begrudgingly reading Emerson, I thought, man I really wish that I had some paper and a pen, because I was just in the mood to write. But, alas, I couldn't so I was forced to learn about Goethe. But now I don't have to worry about being without my Kipling, because my good friend Rob got me a present last night. It was kind of out of the blue, even though he called it a belated christmas present, but he bought me two Rudyard Kipling books and It was very very nice. So I've been enjoying my two books, Captain's Courageous and Just So Stories. And now that I stop to think for a little bit, I'm not really sure where I was going with this post. I think maybe it was more just to write a little bit, so I'll will also add that my friend Chris Bradley just got an old accordian and it's pretty much one of the most awesome things I've seen ever.

Storytime!

Today my mom and I went to our favorite coffee shop for Breakfast and then we went downtown for a bit. We originally were supposed to be getting Gold dollar coins at the mint for Bailey's coin collection, but they were out. Ironic, huh? Anyway we decided to go to the Downtown aquarium instead. It was fun, there were lots of fish there (Surprisingly enough) and some really cute sea otters, but my absolute favorite part was the Stingray tank. Because for 2 dollars you could buy a little tray of Frozen fish to feed them. It was absolutely nuts! You make a fist and hold the little fish between your fingers and then you just put your hand in the water and wait for a stingray to come by. They swim right over your hand and it feels like this little rubber vacuum. It's crazy! Then there was this little stingray and I put the fish in the water and it came and swam over my hand, but then it got a little bit excited, because it grabbed a little bit of my skin with the fish. It was the weirdest thing! It didn't really hurt, but it more or less pinched me and I had a little red spot on my knuckle! Who gets bit by a stingray?? My mom fed it too but she was scared and she screamed. It was fun, I got a little scared after that young one bit me. But it was fun! Well, that's my story of the day. Ok bye.

Alright, I'm done being grumpy about the things that keep going wrong. Everything is going according to God's plan and that's all I need to know. It's the day before Christmas and I hope that everyone is having a very blessed and joyful Christmas. We are going to our 11 o' clock service at Church tonight and that is always one of my favorite things to do, because it prepares me for Christmas day in the right way. It's not about presents, or lights, or snow, or any other thing that the world tries to tell me it's about. It's about the coming Christ. and that is better than any present I could ever receive from this world. At Church on Wednesday we sang the hymn. It's not the same as On Jordan's Stormy Banks, but if you want to hear the tune, go to http://www.lutheran-hymnal.com/lutheranworship/lw014.mid here are the lyrics though for now

On Jordan's bank the Baptist's cry
announces that the Lord is nigh;
awake and hearken, for he brings
glad tidings of the King of kings.

Then cleansed be every breast from sin;
make straight the way for God within,
prepare we in our hearts a home
where such a mighty Guest may come.

For thou art our salvation, Lord,
our refuge and our great reward;
without thy grace we waste away
like flowers that wither and decay.

To heal the sick stretch out thine hand,
and bid the fallen sinner stand;
shine forth and let thy light restore
earth's own true loveliness once more.

All praise, eternal Son, to thee,
whose advent doth thy people free;
whom with the Father we adore
and Holy Ghost for evermore.


I love hymns. Merry Christmas Everyone!

Oh what a Christmas, to have the blues...

Well it's three days before Christmas, and I can't honestly say that I am in the Christmas spirit yet. Don't know why. Normally by this time, It's 24/7 christmas music, Merry Christmases are flying around everywhere, Christmas gifts are wrapped and under the tree and I can hardly wait for Christmas. This year, I just finished my Christmas shopping today, None of my gifts are wrapped, I've said precisely one Merry Christmas to the guy at Starbucks (that was my first of the season today), and the Christmas music I can only take in somewhat small doses. I feel like maybe I should feel guilty about it, but I don't really.

I'm really enjoying christmas break though, I'm not a complete grinch. My family is going back up to breckenridge tomorrow for a fun filled day of sledding, and I just want to take this moment that I am thoroughly looking forward to get my mom and dad on Bob's snowskate. Maybe that will get in me in the Christmas spirit.

Lots of things are happening with my family now. Sigh. Lots of things are going wrong financially and maybe that also has something to do with my lack of christmas joy. My dog needs a surgery that's going to be expensive. My brother's car broke down on his way out here, my car ended up being a lot more expensive to fix than they originally said, my Grandparents always have their medical stuff going on and what not, and of course there is Christmas on top of it to pay for. I know that God will provide financially, but it's hard to not be at least a little bit down. Anyway, Christmas time is coming, and I should be more joyful. Maybe tomorrow....

Simply having a wonderful Christmastime...

Well it's Christmas break and it's been amazing thus far. My friends (Bob, Diana, Bailey, and David) and I drove the 26 hour trip straight through. Why? I couldn't tell you, but it was a fun and cramped and ridiculous trip. If you want to see the pictures, definitely head to my facebook picture album http://ac.facebook.com/photos.php?id=85500234&l=4f70e and then you can look at my other albums too. Anyway, it was a good trip and it still is. Bailey and Bob ended up leaving today, but Diana and David are here until Monday. Diana and I might go to K-mart tomorrow and buy 40 dollar snowboards. Are we nuts? Probably, but hey, it's 40 dollars, and we'll just use them on little sledding hills and stuff to learn. Anyway, so I could talk alot more about the trip and everything else, but I'm a bit mesmerized by the cirque de soleil that is on tv right now, so I'm gonna head out. Maybe there will be more to come later....If you're lucky